Close

I am seriously getting close to coming with A. That is him making me come without my toy. Sex has been different lately, really different. Intimate. Frighteningly so. Intimate.

Last couple of days, great sex. A little awkwardness in initiating maybe. I think this is coming from me though. Prob due to my head space around intimacy at the moment, that and the weird thing of that L word I despise so much. I’m trying to work out it’s meaning or maybe give the feeling a new name, or work out if that’s really what I’m honestly feeling. Is this someone I want to be with long term? Love. ?.

Honestly I’m trying not to think so much because that is when I get myself into trouble. I’m enjoying myself, I’m enjoying time with him. And yes I am utterly scared shit less of whatever Love is or future planning. My head implodes with these sorts of things. I automatically shut myself down or off and I’m really not wanting to do that this time.

Chill the fuck out L and go with it.

Back to orgasms. I’ve had some big ones recently and not just one. The first is generally pretty damn good, and then like I often do, I keep going. And what follows is total awesomeness. Lately there has been lots of shared masturbation, which is great. Slow build ups. Nice in-tune sort of happenings. No complaints.