There is a new adventure. I’m allowing myself to be myself, or rediscovering myself that is. No more selfish lovers. Stat.
For a long time I allowed an individual to use me, I allowed myself to be used. Which angers me more. I allowed myself to lose my power. By power I don’t mean that I want to dominate, only that I gave my power over to someone else. I didn’t take responsibility for myself. I neglected my needs, neglected my own advice to myself.
Self pleasure remained, but had been lacking for a time. Not that I stopped, it just didn’t take me to where I needed to be. I feel like I’m rebuilding this, slowly, and with hurdles, but it’s getting there.
Getting my confidence in myself back.
So new play? I feel surprisingly at ease, there are of course still moments of doubt. But I ride through them, push myself.
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It’s like a band aid yeah, rip the fucker off. And I did.
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